dustin/spencer is a hypocrite

UH ok dustin you won't ride in a gondola with a dude BUT you will BLOW and BONE a dude. yeah ok that makes perfect sense. if I were on the show I'd be friends with mike mike and leroy! everyone else is too much drama. ewwww is dustin's mom 105? beginning stages of racing?? what the fuck is up with this season?!! all of their parents have gone to jail/drug addicts they couldn't find people without skeletons in their closets? hmm oh well. 17th time? super specific. I don't mean to make light of people's issues but dustin is straight up trailer park trash. I feel like dustin is here for drama, he's not genuine and mike mike sees that. EW adam should NOT be allowed to call their place. why wouldn't adam say he did gay porn? he obvs knows because if you google his name (like I did after the first episode) its EVERYWHERE. I'm not sure how I would react, I wouldn't really care and would just mind my business. I would be more concerned with telling dustin that it doesn't matter if he's gay, he should just own it. no one cares who is gay! be who you are. wow I don't think my mom would have googled him, someone obvs did! ok dustin way to NOT handle it. I never would have told heather, she was going to find out. heather has to know its gay porn because I doubt she would be THAT upset over just mainstream porn. I would def want to see either way, what type of porn it was. UH YEAH NO SHIT NANY "uhhh I think its like gay porn" way to state the obvs you idiot. dustin came on the this show, knowing his past, he knew it would come out! I don't feel sorry for him! who cares, he did gay porn BUT he's such a homophobe. EVERYTHING IS TRUE DUSTIN. like he can't lie! dustin you are a fucking LIAR. is dustin that stupid?!! he's surprised she's upset?!! DUSTIN 100% had SEX I SAW IT! dustin you are GAY just admit it!!! how can they all go out like nothing happened? if I were dustin I would just kind of lay low. aww mike mike 'cirque DOO soleil" LOL dustin likes the guy in the little jean shorts. wow how AWKWARD I can't believe dustin actually went up there. he's very used to that. what the fuck is cooke wearing LOL hahahaha way to lighten the mood. whoooaaa way to jump ahead, you were going to have kids with him?!! honey you met him in vegas on the real world. get real. leroy and mike mike are the least homophobic/judgemental in the house! thank you voice of reason leroy! dustin doesn't get it. HOW CAN DUSTIN SIT THERE AND LIE. there were NO straight men in that house!!! THANK YOU LEROY. dustin is completely hypocritical. dustin needs to talk to god?? im a little confused about where that came from but I want to jump through the tv. I would be like ok bye dustin. good riddance. you love him?? heather along with the rest of the girls in the house need to screw their heads on straight. I agree with mike mike, dustin would have said nothing and continued to be judgemental. he should have told heather, I don't think heather would have repeated it had he told her. home alone LOL LOL aww mike mike and leroy trying to make heather feel better. he needs to sit everybody down and not lie. OH PLEASE he didn't have a lot of options. is he fucking serious?!!! I'm no joke watching this and shaking my head. wow thank you heather for making an obvs statement here that dustin is a fucking hypocrite. DUSTIN YOU ARE AN ADULT, YOU MAKE YOUR OWN DECISIONS. I would not have been able to sit there and listen to that bullshit. the letter said NOTHING about mike mike hating him, dustin is delusional. yes she will see you having sex with other guys because it HAPPENED. oral sex & anal sex HELLOOOO he needs to stop lying. it gave you opportunities????? what were they? he just doesn't get it.

someone unlocked jeana's psych ward

slade is an "artist" now because he's a homeless man that will need to sell them on the corner. how does slade have NO money?!! he has absolutely no savings?! probably not, he doesn't seem too smart. I feel that gretchen knows slade isn't going anywhere because he needs the show and her "celebrity" so she acts how she really is. the way she treats slade now is the REAL gretchen, which is a total fucking bitch. she's so phony. WOW alexis you are a fucking TWO FACE. as dina would say TWO FACE. she talks shit about everyone behind their backs and involves herself in aspects that are none of her damn business and then wants to tell vicki to be open with her. OK ALEXIS. message to alexis: just because you keep saying you are a christian woman and try to be "your best" doesn't mean SHIT if you don't act on it. its like people who are mean and nasty but think its ok because they go to church on sundays. uhhhhhh no. I wouldn't want to do any art with slade. sorry. this is just kind of weird. ps who the hell would let slade use their studio?! oh that guy! LOL OMG OMG he was on millionaire matchmaker!!! he was super awkward! those colors actually look nice together but why did that dude stay and hang out. that portrait is really nice. why is this food tasting so awkward?!! did I miss something?? wouldn't the woman being hired want to do what they want? usually tamra is in the episode in the beginning, its kind of weird to have her not be. LOL bahahahaha "why is ice cream in the refrigerator??" I don't know why this is so hilarious to me right now. uh you can get roofied anywhere! vicki should know she was there when peggy and tamra did in ny! vicki pretty much reminds me of my mom! she drives me crazy and doesn't know how to let go. tamra looks great in her runway attire! love tams. peggy's boobies are big but over the muscle EWW not a good look. HAHAHAHAHA who let jeana escape from the mental institution?!! whoever did her hair should be shot. jeana still looks as gross as ever. I don't think jeana looks any different. WHAT THE FUCK IS JEANA TALKING ABOUT?! jeana you are just a battered woman that thinks its ok when men treat women like SHIT. jeana please go kill yourself. thanks. COR-TURE?! bahahahaha ok alexis. this is sad. her dress looks like a dancing with the stars dress, and its fucking hideous. UH where can everyone wear this dress to??? nowhere is right. yes alexis is always right...and here dresses are where?????? thats right nowhere bahahahaha shes so stupid. I feel like I spaced out, what is this fashion show for?? vicki putting briana in a box is hilarious, she loves her daughter but that is just too much! ok what the hell is peggy eating?!! no jeana you def don't look pretty, butt ass ugly is more like it. aww I like that peggy is getting back into what she loves. why is she swinging her arms down the runway?! LOL oh briana is LIT up! she needs to unwind after dealing with her mom. um who the fuck are these old ladies?? awkward. fernanda and her ex have a what together?! I can't understand her. of course lynne would be there. I really like fernanda's sneaks. oh please, all friends kiss their gfs at some point but I can't judge I wasn't there. "tamra likes guys" LOL yes we know lynn. that was just confusing.

where the HELL were you JESUS BARBIE?!

I'm so team tamra. why the hell would she live by simon?!! I know he's the father of her children but I would never want to live by that cuckoobird. simon is a nutcase. I can't believe her mom would let simon come hang out. I would NEVER let that happen. simon is a serial killer. poor donn, he wasn't invited to vicki's 30 year high school reunion LOL. oh here we go with alexis. alexis is the pot stirrer of this season. JESUS BARBIE BAHAHAHAHAHA. alexis is so taylor from bev hills. yeah by the way, alexis and jim defaulted on their 8 MILLION DOLLAR LOAN LOL LOL. gretchen christine beaute bahahaha yeah you have no companies gretch and you owe people bank! pay up BITCH. I want to see her ex-husband chris! I wish he would come on the show. If anyone who reads this knows gretch call chris please. slade doesn't look fat. wow I never thought I'd stick up for slade. wow that clip from the first season of slade is straight up embarassing. yes "taste of your own juice" spaaa voice donn!! I love spa days. why aren't they in robes? def not the spa day I'm used to. uhhhhh why is the massage therapist in a cocktail dress?!! LOL and since when do they have their hair down and gracing your back? oooh she got over the muscle, not a good look. gretch's top is super cute. yeah lets not get on the dad talk with slade. micah is allergic to lip gloss??? yeah I'm with gretchen what the fuck are they talking about?! micah and peggy are weirdos. micah doesn't look right and if they don't look right...THEY AREN'T RIGHT. no peggy, micah is not great looking. well slade why didn't you fucking save any money?!! you have 2 kids!! DEADBEAT. how has tamra screwed over gretch?!!! GRETCHEN YOU ARE A FUCKING LIAR. how can gretchen seriously deny anything with it all on record! tubba wubba isn't even funny! gretchen is like a little kid she says shit that isn't funny but she doesn't get it. omg omg :( I can't believe her dog fell off the table! poor baby. ok virgo and aries don't mesh well. peggy needs to check her astrology chart. their lunch looks good! who says "hello mr and mrs gunvalson"??? especially at a restaurant. wow that's a tiny ass piece of steak. vicki and donn talk like they are friends. I'm a little surprised that vicki and donn are 9 years apart! they look the same age! how can tamra not get any financial support from simon??? that doesn't seem to make sense. that furniture is hideous but hopefully that woman can do some work on it. awww vito and rocco with the soccer balls. sooo sweet :) they are little sausages. slade doesn't have time to work out?! um slade, what do you do during the day??? I'm with slade, that's not nice to constantly call your bf/gf fat. that's kind of emotionally abusive. it's a super double standard because if he called her fat, it would NOT be ok. slade doesn't embarass her publicly! just like tamra isn't lying!! gretch needs to stop being a victim. UH GRETCH should we rewind the tape???? you call slade fat every second! is she really that stupid?!! I mean we're all on the same page right?? LOL omg I kind of feel bad for slade. ALL FLASH AND NO CASH I LOVE LOVE it!!!!! okkkkk did I just see a skinny modeling pic of jim?!! alexis really must have a lot of time on her hands to get mad at this bullshit. wow what does this make me think of????? camille? kyle? YES. where did you go alexis?! because you didn't stick up for tamra. sorry but I don't see alexis' side AT ALL. make a joke about the perrier bottle???? ok. good thing alexis isn't a comedian. she's in the cosmeticare commercial! LOL tamra you can't argue with jesus bahahahaha

I think everyone grows up wanting to work at saddle ranch

bombshell mcgee works at saddle ranch now?! typical. all the employees want to be actors/dancers. don't quit your day jobs. LARRY IS ON HIS WAY IN!!! LARRY IS ON HIS WAY IN!! uh larry blow me. I'm glad his standards for saddle ranch are EXTREMELY high. excuse me while I fall over and laugh my ass off. yes please make the mannequin hanging out of the window more upright, yes that'd be great. 10 commandments of saddle ranch. stop. please stop. I can't breath. I'm embarassed for them. I talked to jackie and she called some hollywood agents to get some crazy whores come work for us to put on a good show. yes sales is so important at a restaurant. either they order food or they don't. "top performers" yeah from the valley. All of these "employees/actors?" should be embarassed. top seller of what??? am I missing something? apparently. wow how romantic..I'd be flattered if I touched a guy's weiner and he vomitted. ohhh that cotton candy looks good :) kameron is like angelina she's a bartender, she does great things. NO HUGGING NO HUGGING! what kind of fucking place is this?!!! rachel is actually bombshell mcgee. yes this is a big challenge! I would never knock anyone's profession but I mean COME ON. oh yeah rachel is so hot..can you even see her through her tattoos? robb Z man is a total bro. I'm sure marky and him know each other. uhhh for how strict the place is, they all dress like bums. yeah I agree with kameron, rachel is soo amazing. she's a fucking bartender LOL. im sure larry wouldn't be too happy that kameron can't make any drinks. oh yes lets sit in the office and discuss this serious situation LOL. yes grenadine on the ice is very serious.

out with the hills in with the trailer park

hi im ceiling eyes. this is the hills revamped to now show me. here's my white trash family. marky is a total bro. casey is married with 2 kids and she's 15. lynn is the biggest piece of trash. my dad is kind of like bruce jenner, he doesn't fit. wow I'm already bored. how come all these starlets do photo shoots that we never see??? is it just for the show? I'm pretty sure cory and audrina aren't even together anymore. why would cory be jealous of a photoshoot? maybe in your head audrina! I'm sure he bones all the pro ho's he can find so you can just worry about yourself. judging by your mom you'll look the same as you do now. ewww creepy willy. like seriously?! audrina has trouble being sexy in front of the camera MY ASS. "she's really nice" and they didn't pay me to say this! mark is like an old bro. if I had to label myself, I'd say I'm the biggest piece of trailer trash around. nice cig voice MOM. to quote nicole richie on simple life " do you love the cigs dear?" I think it's time for lynn to drink some water lay off the booze baby. yeah learn from your mistakes! I'm sure she's been in and out of the "hospital" yeah right she has totally seen that video everyone has! so embarassing. she wants to apologize because she is SHWASSTTEDDDDD. OMG I forgot audrina was part of the celebs who were robbed by the "bling ring" uhhhhhh why would she need to ask her parents if she can move to a new house?!! "fliff flaff to south county?!" what the fuck is she saying? uhhh why don't they put subtitles for lynn? huhh??? please speak so we can understand you. she doesn't look at you like you're little kids she looks at you with beer goggles! soooo stoked to see your new house sis im SO bro. yeah party potential BROOOOOOO dance floor spin tables. LIL BIT LIL BIT. wow ben is creepy! I'm sure he has had some girls in the "voyeur" shower. hahahahabrohahahbro pretty funny. dad's bbqing I'm getting hammered and I'm pretty much shit faced right now. LOL oh yes they are sooo religious! why the hell would they let lynn "walk down the catwalk" is she serious?!! LOL LOL totally! at fashion week random people just walk on the runway. I'm with casey what the hell is lynn talking about? no one is angry???? marky thanks for the BRO moment. yeah lets all sniff the cake.

gay rights apparently means sonja morgan day

LOVE LOVE sonja's bathroom. I'm a little surprised they asked sonja to be the grand marshall. I don't think alex is trying to make it her day by talking about how she is on the committee, but more just making it known she has helped put it together and worked with them. She def gets overlooked so she is trying to be more in the front. the only dress I like is sonja's. I can see sonja's point in that it is part of her day because she is the grand marshall and I think anyone would be nervous. Alex was taking it a little too seriously. Oh there's simon with his bfs :) simon should just admit it, he's here, he's queer and he's fabulous! you go boy! that's weird that sonja would not want anyone else to speak but her. and she has nothing planned to speak about! that was just rude of sonja. it just seems kind of out of nowhere. kelly needs to shut up and butt out. I'm really shocked that luann would stick up for what's right which is that sonja shouldn't have made it about herself. whoa that was a quick move straight towards jill alex! LOL oh WAH WAH jill she's picking on you. grow up you nasty bitch. if I were bethenny I'd be like why was I ever friends with that BITCH?! to be honest it seems like no one knows who the fuck sonja is LOL right??? AWKWARD. sonja should have planned. I'm embarassed for sonja. I agree with alex! sonja sounded ignorant. ok those high chairs cindy's kids sit in look like space eggs. howie and cindy's relationship is kind of weird. why is he always there?! WAIT A SECOND THATS NOT CINDY?!!!!! ok im officially FREAKED OUT. incest is not best. ewwwwww I don't know if I can move on from this LOL GROSS SICK. ok its out. if I were alex I wouldn't even go there with jill! I would just ignore her and tell her not to be at my home. what the fuck is simon talking about?! yes he does love his men. UH DUH. brian looks familiar! haha (only my friend gets this) that photo looks like sonja for sure but its not a self portrait like she seems to think. when sonja wears her hair back she is very barbra streisand. why do all these bitches talk about alex like she's so below them. EXCUSE ME. you whores married into money! NONE of you came from it. sorry but you can never escape where you came from, it always comes out. luann MONEY DOESNT BUY YOU CLASS BITCH. LOL yes ramona, kelly is a complete wackadoo! I would never want to be seen with kelly. is alex serious?! she really never thought sonja would be that way? LOL I could see that the first time she talked. BAHAHAHAHAHAHA ok kelly "mr. gucci" invited you. she's such a famous supermodel. yeah of course kelly isnt staying for the dinner, she was soooo invited and all. oh hell no would I make another placecard! I'd tell kelly to fuck off. ramona is so NOT older than you! kelly is such a worthless, useless cunt. she really is. she has no worth in the world. bethenny was so right in that she lives in another world in her head that no one else sees. she's delusional and needs to be committed against her will. sonja is in the wrong she needs to just admit it. ok that was fucking weird that girl running up to brian! haha she needs to realize that he's only with her old ass for money and exposure. why can't sonja just admit she's the one with the issue. I'm glad alex is sticking up for herself. tonight is not about her and brian. brian is using your ass honey. omg I would have been so mad if I were alex! my blood would be boiling! of course luann would stick up for sonja she is a jill fan. luann is some trailer park trash who feels she's somehow moved up in society. your husband left you for some young chick :) it blows my mind that these women think they are something in the world when no one outside of their old hag friends know who the hell they are!

just say no to joe

omg I totally want that juicer! that would be so awkward talking about sex in front of my brother! I don't know I don't come from a big family so I don't know how they are supposed to act. lamar looks nothing like his parents. maybe if his dad had more meat on his bones he would look like him. its kind of weird because all of a sudden we're hearing about lamar's dad when they have a show. we all know whats up. basketball isn't really my sport I've never really followed it. I don't really have a feeling toward the lakers either way. I have the kardash book! I would love to have them sign it but I don't think they signed in my city. I find it weird that khloe has never met lamar's dad ??? wow thats awkward! he telling khloe thanks for paying my rent is WEIRD! hell to the no would I EVER support either of my parents if they were addicts! since when does rob wear glasses??? scottie pippen huh??? the DEVIL that is his wife was probably there. ew bitch. why would khloe be excited to meet his dad?? LOL lamar "did he ask you for $100?" I would never push it if I were khloe! his dad is not her dad! she needs to get that. I completely side with lamar on the dad issue. why is khloe on the treadmill with her hair down? eww sweaty. why would lamar thank her for telling him to hang with his dad?? his dad is an addict and has never been there I'd be like peace BITCH. wowww I feel so bad for lamar that is so embarassing. all he wants is a parent. he lost his mom and obviously he would like to have a parent but thankfully he has the kardash/jenner fam. I knew it! he didn't get picked. I know enough about basketball to know that. I wonder if lamar doing the show is going to negatively effect him..I get a feeling its not going to turn out well. maybe he'll say something or get flack for something he said. It is nice to see lamar have a vulnerable side. I don't think athletes ever show that side. aww I'm glad khloe and lamar showed up at the celeb game :) :)

dried up prunes of nyc

wow those are the worst intros EVER. kelly is so fucking stupid "living the american dream one mistake at a time" yeah ok that makes total sense. I still want her to produce her degree from Columbia which will never happen! like her dumbass went to college. if I were alex I would never go and talk to jill. I completely agree with alex in that jill tried to start shit to get people on her side and it backfired. karma is a bitch and that bitch is named jill zarin. LOVE LOVE that they are marching for marriage equality! no h8 :) wow kelly is looking hag central! not like she ever looked good but she looks burnt. whats with the housewives trying to use big words and using them incorrectly?! that drives me crazy!! oh fuck you jill, you are NOT nice. jill is a nasty nasty bitch. she needs to stop talking about bethenny because in the press all she says is how bethenny isn't a good friend and was never a friend to her. what is jill in love with bethenny?! sounds like it. ramona said it, jill only likes the underdog or being level with someone. jill needs to get off her loser ass and realize hanging with ANY "celeb" doesn't make her cool. michael lohan, john gosselin? total peeps I want in my circle too! alex and simon's "office" looks like a dungeon. I think they shot scenes from silence of the lambs there. yeah youre right kelly being a model doesnt mean youre pretty! like you! you manly bitch. I didn't know pat benatar was on the show! omg LOVE that she owns completely bare! im all about the BCC :) (ask me what it means LOL) waxing is the best way. you go girl! cindy is cool. kelly shouldnt be talking shit about anyone. bahahahaha we can always count on ramona to quiet the room. I would totally wonder too if I were jill. how can you not? cindy is old. jacque totally looks like a cartoon character/adrian brody. brian only likes her for her money jacque. sorry it is what it is. sonja is beautiful but this is reality. did I miss something? where the hell are the singers/kempens? ramona can't even talk now, her mouth is more demented. alex's hair is SO blonde! but I love it. I must have zoned out during the episode because I have no clue who the hell is getting married. uggghhh im SO over hearing jill whine. why can't she just be an adult and get over it?! OK jill does everyone have to message you when they are coming?! smoke signals? doves? ok got it. who the fuck is jennifer?! I was reading about the red sox being 0-6 and must have zoned out LOL (loving it btw) why would cindy be offended by ramona saying that?! am I out of it or am I just not getting it?? why the fuck would any organization care to use jill's name? jill is such a snob and a fucking bitch! who is she?! she married someone so that makes her royalty? yeah no. also what is wrong with ramona and alex's dresses at the wedding?! its not like anyone is looking at them anyways.